the good and the bad and the grace ko

so i recently came to atlanta

second time ive been here

havent seen my family for a year

before that i hadnt seen them for a few years

its nice in some ways

like getting laundry done for free

free kroean food

free bed

not having to worry about how much water i use

getting spoiled by parents

seeing old memories

free fuji apples so no more ASF :O

but there are alot of bad

realizing how little my parents have left

having to see a doctor a dentist and a optometrist in one day just to get caught up on all my medical stuff

no privacy

working at 7am

seeing how much of a family we are not anymore

being bored out of my mins

riding in the car with my dad in total silence because neither one of us is ready to talk

my parents did very well for themselves…they were real estate agents during the big housing boom

we made so much money it was scary

they used to live in a HUGE house here in ATL

i mean like 6 bedroom house

now they are shacked up in a 3 bedroom apt with enough furniture to supply 3 normal houses

now they manage five dying businesses

i hate seeing them like this

i hate seeing them period

i never want to come back again

legacy

so when i was a HS in like my sophomore year i was lucky enough to have pretty awesome teachers at my church

they all started as retreat counselors and most of them were from UVA

have to give it up to dean and jimmy for being the 2 guys that really had alot of influence on my walk in HS

so i see the state my church is in now

and its sad

God works in all circumstances but i cant help but feel bad that the kids there now dont have what i did back in HS

i think the parents are now the teachers there and that is a blessing for them to give up their time like that

but its hard to relate to them

so a few of the people in my year have decided to go back as retreat counselors

in the beginning i didnt know if i REALLY wanted to go back

i was talking to the praise leader at servants this year and he asked me if I remembered him

of course i did but i was amazed he remembered who i was

i told him about the current state of my church and that i was confused on what to do

he said that i should serve because especially in times like this, they really need leaders

i didnt think of myself as much of a leader but i did care about the youth

and i guess thats all that really matters

as long as i still care about the kids and love my Lord

i think thats all that is required to “lead”

i got a text message from a close brother that said

yo we had great leaders when we were in HS

we atleast owe it to them to give back right?

and it made so much sense

my year was blessed so much by people who gave up alot of their time and energy for us

so im going back with a few friends

to try and continue this legacy that was started way back when

and i pray that God can bless the youth through our actions

i hope that they can see how much we care

i hope i can influence these kids like my leaders did to me

but not by my strength alone

because i am a horrible and wretched sinner who always makes mistakes

we all need times of refreshing

i have high hopes for this retreat

God please shine down on this body of followers

refresh our souls

and please let me be able to be a good influence on the future generation

God is love

pc world

day 43

it is day 43 of being snowed in

not really its only day one

so bored

sleep all day

good thing i didnt get ANY food before the storm

i think

first one to go is billy

since he got no meat on his bones

ima turn him into pho….

no joke

UPDATE….

we went to kroger

billy is safe…for now…MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

y is it so hard?? (twss)

why is it so hard to just let things go and let God handle it??

such a popular question now adays

and the longer ive been in college

the bigger this question has become

its the end of my 3rd year 1st semester

looking for internships that will hopefully turn into jobs

i hand in my crappy resume

and sometimes i think

why cant i just just have a resume and it say

Experience: working till the day i die for God’s Kingdom

References: The Lord

and then boom

the recruiter realizes that is all that matters in this world

wouldnt that be great

but i guess handing in a resume like that just to be sucked into the corporate world is kind of ridiculous

i just wish

that one day itll be so clear to me

maybe after im broken and tattered

destroyed

run over

mangled

ruined

will i be at a point in my life

where im ready to see His true purpose

i think im ready to be at that point

cuz i badly need guidance

i thought i knew what my life was gunna shape out to be like

but how am i suppose to get to that point of utter DEFEAT and BROKENNESS???

when my pride is so big

well maybe after this final in 3 hrs

ill be humbled enough to see

that im  a huge noob without Him

the economics of education is worthless

i wanna take a class like the economics of God

i guess it wouldnt be much of a class since it kinda goes against wut we learn

demand for God is low (we always seem to turn away)

but God supplies us with so much

this doesnt make any economical sense

God is producing alot of His goods which is sold at a price of FREE

yet the demand is so low??

something is wrong here

econ sucks

as i look into my lynn year al’s zerba book

so its 3am

billy is in the kitchen reading up a storm

im in the room TRYING to focus on my math hwk

but i cant help it

when i look at numbers and formulas

i cant help but think wow isnt there more to life

obviously there is more to life then just what is in these pages

furthering the Lord’s kingdom is my main goal in life

but right under that…can UVA really be my gateway to the future?

im not gunna lie, i cant resist the security a steady job will bring me

work a 9-5, make good money, raise a family with it

i mean wuts so wrong with that right??

but too me, even though i think id be comfortable with that, i dont think its ok for me to just be content

sometimes i feel like im cheating myself outa my dreams

Bobby                                    Ben

i really look up to these guys

Bobby and Ben hundreds are co creators of the brand The Hundreds

i have alot of their clothes

they were both law school students at loyola law school in LA

they met and realised they had alot in common when it came to style

both really into the sub culture of punk rock and hiphop

you can see this in their designs as they use alot of blacks with flourescent colors

it reminds people of the 80’s

even the graphics remind people of cartoons they used to watch as kids

their brand is a testament to California culture and how its a big mixing pot of styles and taste

not just in clothes but in music, art, and pretty much anything anyone is into

this is Adam Bomb

it’s the logo for the hundred’s brand

love this guy

basically bobby and ben followed their dream…they took what they loved and turned it into their life

bobby says “i wanted to live my life drawing cartoons but not as just a cartoonist”

now these law school kids own a brand that is worn by everyone from me to celebrities

they jet set around the world to promote their brand and learn more about other brands

they are personal friends with artist that i admire like David Choe, Topher, Michael Lau

Bobby designs everything that they sell

they have done collaborations with different artist and corporations like Disney

they supply clothes to over 400 stores not to mention their flag ship stores in California

i can only dream of one day doing what they have done…not make my own clothing brand (but that would be ballin)

but just follow my dream and work hard cause i know ill be successful

fear of the unknown draws me back into this safe shell of schooling and eventually desk jobbing

i dont want to make it sound like there is any wrong with that

if your passion is to be secure and have a steady living so you can support a future family

then praise God for that

but a part of me doesnt think thats enough

though ill prolly follow this path because i dont have the COJONES to actually jeopardize security

yea i know im a sell out

maybe one day ill be able to be like Bobby and Ben

make work not seem like work cause its something i love…

anyways its 3:20

back to life of hwk, test, papers, and all nighters

later world…

full of worth survey

1. Where is your cell phone? in my pants

2. Your hair? needs a shave

3. Your mother? hides stuff from me

4. Your father? hides stuff from my mother

5. Your favorite food? chipotle, pho, anything juno’s mom makes

6. Your dream last night? no idea…but i either killed someone or someone killed me

7. Your favorite drink? pepsi max all day

8. Your dream/goal? cook/own my own restaurants in major cities

9. What room are you in? my lair

10. Your hobby? fixed gear, watching people, saving the world

12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? in the kitchen of my restaurant

13. Where were you last night? at mcd with billy

14. Something that you aren’t? smart

15. Muffins? only good from the waist up

16. Wish list item? lots of moneys

17. Where did you grow up? florida

18. Last thing you did? poop

19. What are you wearing? nothing

20. Your TV? vizio POS

21. Your pets? my bike

22. Friends? cant live without them

23. Your life? needs a cure…

24. Your mood? anxious

25. Missing someone? they know

26. Vehicle? Mitsubishi Evolution 8…fast but pain in the butt to maintain

27. Something you’re not wearing? everything

28. Your favorite store? uniqlo

29. Your favorite color? green

30. When was the last time you laughed? dinner

31. Last time you cried?… cant remember

32. Your best friend? dont like to label but i do have a”good friend of mine”

33. One place that I go to over and over? bathroom

34. One person who emails me regularly? UVA

35. Favorite place to eat? chipotle

the killer…

she is beautiful

dark flowing hair like a river on a moonless night

eyes so entrancing they could stop a raging bull

skin that looks and feels like silk

a smile known as the “widow maker” because it steals the hearts of all men

the perfect height where she fits right under your chin

walks with grace

speaks with gentleness

with a laugh that fills people with joy

who is she?

i wonder where she is?

it doesnt matter…

CUZ WHEN SHE TAKES A REAL SMELLY DUMP ALL OF THIS MEANS NOTHING!!!!

…the killer

introducing!!!!!!!! THE PHENOM FROM VIETNAM!!!!!!

so this post is gunna be about billy

and how he pwned p90x in the face with his BILLY900XX

so first you have to eat food like this

thats right…that is a chocolate ice-cream and nutella sandwich

this is the corner stone meal to his flawless diet

i think his philosophy behind it is to punish his body as much as possible

so that his own soul will get depressed and start to throw up…soulfully….neways

yea so he just tries as hard as he can to get unhealthy and in return his body hate itself

then it beats itself up (itself as in his insides) which then translates into a FAT BURNING BEAUTIFYING WORKOUT !!!!!

indeed if u want to follow this diet in full detail…you can pay billy $264,000 for a 3 week meal plan

i know i know how can he sell something so awesome for so cheap

well dont worry he also demands your first born

it some weird Vietnamese thing

i dont know google it

here are the results from the BILLY 900XX workout

yes that is billy himself

LOOK AT THE MUSCLE TONE!!!!!!!!!!!

LOOK AT THE SLENDER FIGURE!!!!!

MY EYES

WHILE WRITING THIS BLOG I HAVE BECOME BLIND AHSFDINAFSDKJF>SDKLNFKSDJF

pc world

between a rock and a hard place

so this entry is about the times when i feel like

yo wth do i do now?

it when someone is being a completely dummy head to me and is giving me a big attitude

or when someone is treating me a certain way that i dont like for a long period of time

i used to straight up be like yo

youre mestup

and then id usually get the response “stop crying about it” “stop over analysing it” “stop being a girl”

something along those lines

its like yo wth u said something and i dont like it yet youre telling me how i should handle it

but usually no matter what i say

im wrong

always seem to be wrong

maybe its my personality that i let them think that i am wrong

i joke alot and i act immature

so maybe im asking for it

but at the same time

it sucks

so now when stuff like this happens

i dont say nething

cuz i know what the response is gunna be

so i just take it

but i hate it

what can i do though?? if i say sumtin im wrong

if i dont then i admit im wrong

does anyone else get into this situation????

maybe i do overanalyse things…but i feel like over analysing something and being careful is better than not analysing things enough

maybe i joke on too many ppl for other ppl to think its hypocritical for me to get mad when i get joked on

i think ive done a real good job dropping back on what i say

hopefully i havent hurt too many ppl recently with my words

am i immature?

i wonder

the fact that i act like it to have fun with my close friends

is that enough to label me immature??

does that validate the ppl that i feel talk down to me even though we are the same year?

and if youre reading this now and saying to yourself wow chris you need to stop being a girl or sumtin like that

then to u

shut your mouth and look at yourself before u judge

dont need people like that

YouLiars

why is it that when someone puts a video of themselves singing on youtube…

in the more info box its all

“i was bored so i decided to make this”

“dont mind my voice i have a cold”

so after practicing atleast 5 times

they get all just-got-outa-bed-like

grab their guitar

turn on a light but always off camera to make it like its been on but in reality its to make it moody

then sing

are we that insecure of our passions?

if u like to sing cant u just put

“i put this video on youtube to show u guys wut i like to do…if its bad then im sorry im bad i just like signing”

but i guess you putting it on youtube kinda shows that u think u can sing well…or your singing is bearable?? (hehe bearable…its like ‘able to be a bear’)

STOP BEING YOULIARS AND JUST ADMIT THAT U PRACTICE THAT SONG MORE THAN U BLINK IN A DAY!!!

neways just a small rant

not a sermon, just a thought

CHRIS JUN PRISE CONTEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tell me where thats from holler

NO GOOGLING THAT IS AGAINST UVA HONOR CODE AND THUS AGAINST THE JUN HONOR CODE (only chris jun can break it)